The second reason Santa needs hearing aids is due to workplace noise exposure. Santa is exposed to significant workplace noise which can cause hearing loss. It has been clearly shown in the documentary film Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer that Santa’s workshop is open a full 364 days a year and the elves use hammers, nailing guns, saws and other noisy equipment. Accounting for these sources of noise and the lengthy exposure times, hearing damage is significant over time. I am certain that Santa’s workshop is not OSHA compliant with providing hearing protection since no one even knows where it is located for inspections. Santa is also exposed to loud noise from drummers drumming, horns playing and the ever-present jingle bells jingling which can also cause hearing loss.
The third reason Santa needs hearing aids is due to noise exposure from his vehicle. On Christmas Eve Santa travels around the entire world delivering gifts to all the children on his “nice list.” In his open sleigh pulled by the reindeer, he must move at supersonic speeds to accomplish this task. The wind noise alone would be tremendous at these speeds, not to mention the sonic booms which can reach levels of 200 decibels (louder than a jet engine). This noise is also harmful to Santa’s hearing and has certainly contributed to his needing hearing aids.
The fourth reason that Santa needs hearing aids is his age. Santa is old…very old. According to legend, he was born as Saint Nicholas in 280 A.D. which would make him 1,734 years old this year. It is well-known that the incidence of hearing loss increases with advancing age and it is therefore extremely likely that Santa has hearing loss and needs hearing aids.
So….if you are reading this Santa, please do the children of the world (and Mrs. Claus) a favor. Consider getting your hearing tested and wearing a pair of hearing aids. You will be able to hear the children’s requests clearly again and avoid Christmas morning disappointments. Don’t push your hearing down to the bottom of your priority list, next to getting your teeth cleaned. Take years off your physiological age by simply improving your hearing.
P.S. – I want a new 160 cm Burton Snowboard. :)
The Hear Doc – TM
For more information about hearing loss, hearing loss prevention, ringing in the ears (tinnitus) or hearing aids, go to: www.theheardoc.com